2/24/2019

I LOVED the example of your 3 cancellations, and then (randomly, but not!) finding 3 young men ready to listen to your message! What a sweet compensatory blessing!! Reminds me of that line from Elder Scott's talk, "Find the compensatory blessings in your life when, in the wisdom of the Lord, He deprives you of something you very much want." Not always quite as obvious as that one!, but surely a direct blessing from  your diligence in the face of adversity! And your attitude shows so much faith even when things are NOT easy! In that same talk Elder Scott says, "Your joy in life depends upon your trust in Heavenly Father & His holy Son, your conviction that their plan of happiness truly can bring you joy." It is SO hard to remember our circumstances are not what make us happy!! Elder Brough in last conference said simply, "We can always rejoice when we keep the commandments." Actually, as I was looking for that quote, the idea was repeated SO MUCH in tons of talks! So glad you are finding the joy.  Awesome that you still get to be in the mountains, and feeling so grateful for people's humility. You're doing so great!

It's a weird Sunday here!--Dad took Spencer & Emily up to hear Layton speak for his mission last night, and I stayed home with a pretty sick Anne & Lucy.  Jane skips around happily, SAYING she's sick (because of all the attention it gets the girls), but loving keeping everyone happy by getting them drinks or food on trays or playing games on the couch with them.  It's been pretty (clean! &) quiet around here! I took just Jane to church today, and took her with me (& Emily) yesterday to see the High School funny musical "Addam's Family." Drama dept quality's definitely gone up since you were a bear, which I know isn't saying much, haha, but there were a group of kids in the ward in it and had a great time. Being about this quirky/goth-ish family, there was one scene where they were howling at the moon or something, and Jane (who LOVED the whole thing & was scared to leave during intermission to miss even one minute of it(??!!!!) said, "Oh, they're howling, just like I do!" I think she's found her imaginary dream family--perfect combination of funny/scary.  

It was nice to have Monday off for everyone!, and even Maddie & Brian joined us for the day.  Dad made hot wings, and though I was grateful for the motivation to get things cleaned up for company, I was otherwise pretty dead most of the day.--& then week.  I read a couple of books for the first time in mooonths, but otherwise, was not feeling too great.  Had conferences for Anne & Lucy on Thursday, and those are like little reward days--to hear how patient & willing to help others Lucy is, and how well they're doing.  Thursday was a bridal shower for Rachel Anderson (did you know her?) I helped out with--always a lift to be surrounded by good women, and she's getting married in the temple, which is great! Dad & I went and cleaned at the temple Friday night, which felt so long!!--but by yesterday, I started having a pretty good day again, and today has been so much better too, thank goodness!! 

It stinks having those days where you don't even want to get up and face things, but it does remind me how it feels to rely more on the Lord.  I know this is really temporary discomfort--I am in awe of how people stay upbeat through serious chronic illness.  I'm pretty wimpy! Took the YW to visit the widows and older sisters in the ward for activities this week--everyone loves those nights--& Emily's been an awesome ministering partner, as one older sister we go sees ONLY talks to her & Mabel Shumway! I LOVE having the YW so involved w/ ministering, and that we take time in our class to go over needs of girls.  Just today, Tamsyn mentioned that Bri Hurst (hasn't been to church since I've been here) was struggling Friday, and when she asked her about it, she found out about some health struggles in the family no one in the ward had heard anything of yet.  It is a blessing for those they serve, and a huge blessing for any teenage struggle to learn that ability to serve, and they DO SO WELL!!! It is sweet to see the Lord's trust in such young people, and THEIR ABILITY as they are given responsibilities.  Great time to be alive!

Love you so much! Nick & Laurie should have Boy#2 this week!! & Uncle Kurt was in the hospital last weekend for a weird--almost stroke, but maybe ultra migraine(??), Sadie got into nursing school at UVU (yay!), and Kenzie Lewis spoke for her mission today too--headed to South Carolina, and Emma Tackett was just called to Milan, Italy.--& Briant & Katie just got back from taking their 3 oldest to the Rome Temple Open House/visiting cousins! Otherwise, I think we're hanging in there! Love every word from you, and all your goodness! Love, Mom

pics: Emily & Spencer doing baptisms a few weeks ago, and Jane's playdo elephant (she just asked if I could type her howling)

2/17/2019

Okay, my toughness (however little of it there is) started really waning this week! I was SO tired of feeling sicky and exhausted, and was reminded in strong ways of why I did NOT want to be pregnant.  As dishes and laundry (& snow!) piled up around my exhausted outlook, I was really feeling overwhelmed and discouraged.  I wanted to make Lucy's birthday & Valentine's Day fun and special, and enjoy taking the youth to the temple (in a blizzard), but after taking care of those events, I found myself wasting most of the next day on the computer--looking at cribs, strollers, etc. for way too long.  THEN, Diana--my seriously sent personally from Heaven friend--asked if I had time to visit for a minute.  Jane & I went over for a bit before school got out, and first--even though her youngest child is almost 18, she said how she kept thinking of how exhausted I must be, and how long things must be seeming--physically & mentally. She has thought often of staying willing to have more children even though it was so hard getting the two here they have.  She can imagine what it would be like though, and she has considered the difficulty at an older age.  It just meant a lot to be understood without having to even say anything! 

   Then she said she had thought of me when reading an Ensign article from Sheri Dew about being reminded of who we really are, AND our purpose being on the Earth at this specific time--even a line about the need for courageous parents/leaders to raise this chosen generation.  It was a good reminder, and I found the article later, and LOVED the principle that the Spirit REMINDS us of WHO WE REALLY ARE & WHO WE HAVE ALWAYS BEEN.  

Here's an excerpt:

There is nothing more vital to our success and our happiness here than learning to hear the voice of the Spirit. It is the Spirit who reveals to us our identity—which isn’t just who we are but who we have always been. And that when we know, our lives take on a sense of purpose so stunning that we can never be the same again.

… Our spirits long for us to remember the truth about who we are, because the way we see ourselves, our sense of identity, affects everything we do. … It affects the very way we live our lives. So, today, I invite you to ponder in a new way not just who you are but who you have always been.

… Can you imagine that God, who knew us perfectly, reserved us to come now, when the stakes would be higher and the opposition more intense than ever? When He would need women who would help raise and lead a chosen generation in the most lethal spiritual environment? Can you imagine that He chose us because He knew we would be fearless in building Zion?

… Noble and great. Courageous and determined. Faithful and fearless. That is who you are, and that is who you have always been. Understanding that truth can change your life, because this knowledge carries a confidence that cannot be duplicated any other way.

… When you understand that you were chosen and reserved for now, and when you live in harmony with that mission, you’ll be happier than you have ever been before.

… God is our Father, and His Only Begotten Son is the Christ. May we rejoice in once again standing tall for the Savior and serving with valor and vigor in His vineyard. And may we be fearless in building up the Zion of our God—because we know who we are and who we have always been.

THEN, as often happens when there's a message I really need to hear, I heard the same principle AGAIN in a BYUI devotional I happened to be listening to, where the speaker shared his own, & Amulek's experiences of remembering who they really are.  He talked about Satan DISGUISING his true identity to get into the Garden of Eden, and his constant efforts to have US forget who we really are! THEN, he brought out the verse of "Now Let Us Rejoice"--(I LOVE that song AND we just sang it in church last week) where it says, 

"We'll love one another & never dissemble"--and I always thought "never dissemble" meant never have disunity; but he taught that the definition is ACTUALLY to "conceal or disguise one's true feelings or beliefs"!!!

After that boost, I woke up Friday, still feeling miserable, but SO FULL OF HOPE, and the sun even poked through the snowclouds for a minute.  Lucy DID have a fun birthday, we made it safely to the temple where the snow had stopped, and had a fun Valentine's spaghetti dinner as a family.  Friday night, Dad & I saw Tucker in a play down in SLC (fun to see Sarah & family), and had delicious subs at a meatball shop on the way.  Then Emily & I started prom dress shopping yesterday, which was a blast.  Love you so much, and love that we're able to stay connected as a family as you serve.  I loved that the focus of this new phone calling announcement is so that families can feel a part of that missionary effort.  Especially with the home-centered focus--it makes perfect sense to keep that sharing of spiritual growth, but no pressure to call for our sake--you know we're awkward in conversation, haha--whatever seems best for you week by week!

Anyway, on to the day to day: Dad's duct-taping his pant-hem for church today & Jane's trying to convince someone to make crepes while she tells us she can't walk because of a scratch on her leg.   Happy President's Day off tomorrow for everyone!

Love, Mom

2/10/2019

Maybe because I'd been too long on Instagram or something, but I was feeling weighed down yesterday, instead of grateful--in my mind of constant comparison.  I've really been blessed to be able to shift gears and be thrilled about this baby coming, but every once in a while, I still think of how different things COULD've been.  I was feeling financial limitations, thinking of Nate & Stacey's freedom to sell everything and move--w/ no ties to "stuff" and how impossible that feels; I was seeing too many pictures of people's cruises--which seemed like something we might be able to find a deal on in the future, and now feels eons away; feeling stress about not being more physically able to manage things for Maddie's wedding reception (which would also save money!); tired of not being able to do my hair or makeup, etc., etc. and I KNEW nothing in my life had changed so dramatically from the last time I was overwhelmed with gratitude, so it was just my heart that was messed up, not my life! 

I was reading scriptures as we were driving to a little birthday gathering for Stacey, and I was reading about Lehi stuck in the dark and dreary wilderness--& that it was MANY HOURS, so he began to pray.  It's interesting too, that it wasn't like everything was suddenly made right by praying, but that Lehi could SEE MORE; he "beheld"--and had better perspective of where he was in things.  So I prayed in my little pity party moment that I'd be able to let go of all the stuff that didn't matter and made me sad, and be able to remember how grateful I was in our good life; and it wasn't an instant shift, but I did find that awesome talk by Elder Brough in last Conference, "Lift Up Your Head and Rejoice" as I was looking at things for my YW lesson where he also referred to Lehi and how even in his many trials, HE STILL FOUND JOY, and how, no matter how many hard things we may be facing (much harder than not having good make up even), we can ALWAYS FIND JOY FROM KEEPING THE COMMANDMENTS.  That no matter how many things we can't control, or how many hard things there are, we are STILL able to find joy.  I wept through the talk, and thought, "Do I need to use this for my lesson tomorrow on ministering??--It impacted me so much", but then the peace came (I had already chosen a different lesson)--that my lesson was fine, and that talk was just for what I needed to hear.  As always, it was great to be with family and get caught up with Nate & Stacey's family over good food.

Luke spoke today!--SO great, as you know he always speaks from his heart---and seriously--his whole talk was on JOY, and guess what he used to illustrate?--Lehi and his adversity and 2Ne 2:25, that we really are here to find joy.  Love it.

I felt super close to you this week as the sister missionaries called needing someone to go on splits with them!--I got paired up with a BRAND NEW sister who had literally been out of the MTC a week! to go teach 2 siblings chastity and WoW--& as her sr companion left us for a different teaching appt, the new sister kept saying, " But I don't know what to say! I don't know what I'm doing! What am I supposed to do?--& I tried to play it cool, telling her we'd be fine.  She told me before we went in, "I just feel like crying all day!" & I assured her it was totally normal and that this was the hardest part, and every day would get better and better.  The teaching went great--she stepped in and figured it out just fine, but OH, my heart wanted to hug her all day, bless her heart!! Missionary work is not for the faint of heart! 

We have started Lucy's vision therapy, and while we were in Logan, we got her ears pierced for her birthday!! She's excited!! (Other picture is Anne at an assembly getting to make ballooen animals) Everything else is going great--if you come up with any cool Taiwanese names, let us know--I'm really struggling! Love you tons, and SO thrilled with all you're doing!! Gabe Hatch?? asked how you were doing, and EVERYone in the ward always wants an update every time they see us! Love, Mom

2/3/2019

Well, the highlight of the week was definitely getting to see your face & visit with you for a minute! And we've been doused in rain the last few days, so we're pretending it's a taste of Taiwan.  I was also busy getting the last bit ready for our YW New Beginnings that was on Wed.  I was SO tired this week, and feeling sort of spiritually "foggy"--which, right before being in charge of a program I want the Spirit there for is kind of wretched.  

BUT, because I was feeling like it was hard to fit things in, I WAS that much more grateful when things DID come together (trying to better appreciate that opposition in all things).  My counselors and advisors (& Emily) were so good to keep reminding me that simplicity really is best as I started feeling stressed about not doing more of a production night.  We focused on the youth theme "If Ye Love Me, Keep My Commandments" John 14:15; and as I was searching for what to share to introduce it, I was prompted to share part of your last letter where you bore testimony about what made the difference in your Chinese study, and making Christ the focus of our WHY.  Even in that fog, sharing something so close to my heart (and feeling closer to you) brought the Spirit and reminded me of my testimony of God's love for us.  

It's been such a treat getting to see you in pictures Sister Peterson posted, and thinking of you really being on the other side of the world! Hope you're able to appreciate the adventure of it all, and gradually settle in! I've become SUPER grateful for Pres. & Sister Peterson being there to love you and be inspired in your behalf. Love you so much, and praying for you constantly!!! Love, Mom

1/28/19

Dear Brent, 

SOOOO relieved that visa finally came, but what a bonus gift of patience/humility you got too having to completely let go like that.  We're praying hard for you as you transition into everything over there!! It's amazing how much more meaning there is in praying for the missionaries, or in Ward Council, when they announced how many missionaries we have in our ward!

We celebrated Anne's birthday this week: Krave cereal, Happy Meal lunch, and beef stroganoff for dinner.  She wanted a new doll and clothes--and since I had YW that night, I took the girls to the Jump Zone Saturday afternoon while Dad was still reffing games (& Spencer/Emily did temple baptisms).  Anne also beat Dad in Shanghai this week, which gives me fabulous hopes--you know Dad, even for her birthday, wouldn't just allow her to win--haha.  

We talked in Ward Conference about the Youth Theme of the Year--John 14:15, and how commandments are such a sign of love, not restriction.  In reading Lehi's vision again too, I am reminded/trying to convince myself more fully that the Lord REALLY has designed for us to be not just saved, but happy HERE, and the Gospel really is the HAPPIEST option for us.  I loved the message from Come Follow Me this week too on change, and what a miracle it is that we are all capable of change through Jesus Christ.  Really is the best hope and happiness you get to share.  There was a little Chinese family at the Jump Zone--of course I nearly cried just hearing them speak and feeling already so connected to them ;).  Love you more than I can say, and will be thinking of you constantly this week--can't wait for you to meet Pres. Peterson and get things rolling! You will (continue to be) amazing!! Love, Mom

1/20/2019

 It's been a good week--helped an old friend move yesterday on the way to fix your pin #.  I laughed as I sat there packing her wine in my BYU sweatshirt.  She's not super active right now, and going through a hard time.  As I was thinking of her this week, I remembered comments she's made about how she's just too rebellious for the Gospel.  Elder Uchtdorf spoke at a BYU devotional this week though, and it was like he was talking just to her, saying, "If you think you're too different, that you just don't believe like the rest of your family or have messed up too much, DON'T WORRY!!! We are ALL broken! We ALL need the help of the Savior!" I really do have a testimony that the Gospel IS for everyone! We all have different strengths and things that come more easily, but we ALL need a Savior, and His plan really is do-able for ALL of us, and designed to bring EVERYone maximum joy.  I hope her journey away from the church isn't long--her heart and loving others are so good, and I'm grateful we still have a good relationship.  When we talked in Sunday School of what a SLOW PROCESS conversion is (Elder Bednar's pickle parable), it reminds me how annoying progress is, but also how HOPEFUL it is that we can ALL change one bit at a time.  

We dropped some extra soup off to a couple of new baby families Monday night, and then Dad came with me on a Ward Council assignment to visit families in the ward.  We totally felt like missionaries--dropping by for no reason to just say hi.  I took some bread & missed one family, but actually had a good little visit with one family (of a YW) we haven't seen at church for a while.  The dentist office all asked about you with our semi-annual cleaning--we had a good sledding night for youth night Wed, and had a nice Ward Temple Night last night up in Logan.  Dad & I took a little adventure for our date night Friday--& ended up in Snowville haha!--eating at a cute local diner & chatting with the waitress who was from--no lie!-- a town of 100 people!! (Stone, Idaho).  

Okay, the other thing that stood out to me this week was from a Pres. Nelson talk a few years ago "Face the Future with Faith" and I was exercising as I heard these words about prayer, and I thought "Is that real?!--is he just referring Joseph Smith?--are our prayers THAT specifically noted?!" so I went back and read it later, and it has made me so much more focused on sincere prayer.  Sweet Cindy Parry said after temple night she is trying to be more sincere in HER prayers, and she even had to be grateful for how good the peas in her soup were one night!--ha!

Anyway, here's the quote from Pres. Nelson--it is powerful how he applies the promises in D&C to all of us:

If we pray with an eternal perspective, we need not wonder if our most tearful and heartfelt pleadings are heard. This promise from the Lord is recorded in section 98 of the Doctrine and Covenants:

“Your prayers have entered into the ears of the Lord … and are recorded with this seal and testament—the Lord hath sworn and decreed that they shall be granted.

“Therefore, he giveth this promise unto you, with an immutable covenant that they shall be fulfilled; and all things wherewith you have been afflicted shall work together for your good, and to my name’s glory, saith the Lord.”8

The Lord chose His strongest words to reassure us! Seal! Testament! Sworn!Decreed! Immutable covenant! Brothers and sisters, believe Him! God will heed your sincere and heartfelt prayers, and your faith will be strengthened.

Praying for all to go well with your travel plans this week!!--delays are SOOO hard--Elder Holland has such a great quote to help perspective though: "There is purpose in the time it takes"

("The Inconvenient Messiah" Feb 1984 Ensign)

Love you all and the great work you're doing!

Love, Mom

1/13/19

Dear Brent,

I've appreciated remembering the scripture "With God, nothing shall be impossible" this week in our Come Follow Me study.  Mostly I've applied that to a lot of cleaning up vomit, but always nice how the Lord's help is so personalized haha. We hope it also applies to your visa going through on time! So exciting to have real travel plans--& I'm hoping that means your visa is okay??--or at least on track?!

We had the Shumway younger 4 kids Mon & Tues while their parents were out of town, and as I struggled a bit with feelings of "Life's not fair" this week as the kids passed along stomach bugs -ha!--You'd think I would've outgrown it soon enough w/ Grandpa always answering with, "You're right, Life's not fair!" but it's such a part of human nature! It helped to connect with others--Sis. Hess's brother passed away, so we got together a gift from YW leaders, and Sis. Sandall had surgery, so we dropped off bread & jam; and then POOR Bishop!!!--got his hand chewed up in his snowblower!!!--so we've been praying hard for him, and the Laurels heart attacked his door (& Sis Hess's) for activities.  Then Bishop spoke today in ward council about the funeral for this brother, who had been homeless a lot of his life, and how many homeless people attended the funeral, and I thought, in a different way, "Life's really not fair"--only with a feeling of gratitude.  I was reading through one of my old journals too--during a really hard time of life, and I had written how grateful I was for a talk by Sis Oscarson where she said, "All that is unfair can be made right through the Atonement." It's so true--and so easy to forget, but so true.  

In between stomach bugs and sheet washing (SO GRATEFUL FOR OUR NEW WASHER/DRYER!!!!--THEY WORK SO FABULOUSLY!!!!), we've had the usual: basketball, dance, violin, and met up w/ Blair & his wife/mom at the temple Friday night, then tried a new Japanese place in Brigham City--yummo.  Anne made the robotics club & I took Lucy to another eye doctor this week (her 3rd) to look at vision therapy, and he concluded that her binocular vision was so great from just having had her glasses a few months, that vision therapy would be excessive and unnecessary! Love little miracles like that! Good luck as your time winds down there, and know we love and pray for you always!! Love, Mom

Attachments area

1/6/19

It’s hard writing when I’m battling my own silly discouragement & feel like I don’t have any light to share.  I just wish I could do better at having enough energy to do more good w/o getting more exhausted or becoming impatient with others. I see so many others’ good examples of implementing “Come Follow Me” & feel so lame & uninspired. Thank goodness this is a Gospel of change!

I do sure love 2 hour church!!!—& I loved in SS the scripture in D&C about all being edified by all & not to covet!—-(I so need to work on that one—it’s one of Satan’s tricks to have me coveting other people’s successes so I feel inferior).  

And I loved studying Mary & Elizabeth to teach with the family tonight & how Elizabeth had prayers answered, but according to God’s timing; while Mary—NOT praying for a child—had to learn humility with God’s will being so different from her expectations—I have such a hard time with that one!—I have a hard time reconciling the idea that we need to be “agents unto ourselves to act & not be acted upon”, but then when things come along to make me switch courses I feel like it’s useless to keep trying to direct my path or that I have it all wrong!—but I love Mary’s brave & humble example & I love that she was blessed with Elizabeth.

After taking down Christmas decorations, we celebrated New Year’s Eve w/ gyoza, cheese balls, & Martinelli’s—Spencer & Emily went to the church dance while Brian joined Maddie over here where we worked on a puzzle (our 4th!).  New Year’s Day we all played ball in the church gym together for a few hours, and by Wed., everyone was back to school/work!—Jane & I enjoyed having Maddie a few more days —& we grabbed Emily for a fun girls lunch on Friday.  I also ran to the temple that morning—at first sad to miss the 9 AM session, but then grateful I was able to see the changes in initiatory & sealings—it was really beautiful & an unexpected joy.  Spencer & Anne started Jr Jazz games Sat (& Dad started reffing) & seemed to have fun!—Spencer has a positive coach this year—(Hooray!)—& it was great watching Anne catch on so quickly on how to improve.  We had a big bacon/hash browns & egg breakfast for Dad & then birthday cake after homemade pizza & presents.  (He still had to spend most of his day on the court, but supposedly he likes it!), & I took Maddie to the train station that night to head back to Provo.  We’re anxious to hear your travel plans!—& I did check multiple times on that package, but they said b/c of all the Christmas rush, it is still possibly stuck in the backlog & to give it a few more days—if you haven’t seen it by tomorrow though, I think I’ll just reorder.  Lots of snow up here this morning!!—Woke up to early church, snowblowing the driveway, & would’ve gotten to my Mtg in time w/ dinner in the crockpot except Lucy came up to tell me how much she had thrown up in her bed & hallway!—poor thing—she seems to be doing better!—just hope that it doesn’t go through the whole house! Sorry to be a downer this week—so so proud of you & all you’re doing & we pray constantly for you—both here in preparation & as you get to Taiwan!—You’ll do amazingly well!!—love how well you’re learning in your genuine humble state! (& wish I could be more that way!)—loved this quote that made me think of you from Bobby Lewis’s talk last week:

As the missionaries experience their “moment of

truth,” the divine miracle begins. Gradually, line upon line, precept upon

precept, through the days, weeks, and months of giving themselves over to faith

and faithfulness, their souls unfold. Spiritual values replace physical and

material values and transcend intellectual and social values. The doctrine of

the priesthood distills upon their souls “as the dews from heaven” (D&C

121:45), and the Holy Ghost becomes their companion. Through their devoted

service the Lord writes his laws and his love into their lives, “written not

with ink, but with the Spirit of the living God; not in tables of stone, but in

fleshy tables of the heart.” (2 Corinthians 3:3.)

Spiritual Roots of Human Relations by Stephen R. Covey

Your soul is definitely unfolding in beautiful ways️. Have a great week! Love, Mom